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shells.

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**pic is a teeny aiden :)**

Chris and I were stuck in traffic this week and drove past a cemetery where someone was being buried.  
Literally just right there near the side of the road they were lowering a person’s casket down. 
 I said to Chris, “how do people do it?”…I mean if that was one of our babies and the last moment when they close the casket…and you will never see or touch that little body again…it’s just so final.

And then he reminded me.

“Case, those are just their tiny shells. Burying them is honoring that tiny shell that they used while they were here….but that is all it is, a shell. 
We would know their souls were in heaven….and that is what gives us hope….and what makes it okay.”

Tiny shells. I love that.

I remember when I saw the movie Avatar it gave me such a perspective on heaven. (I know strange but this is how my mind works)….the people would be in the Avatar bodies…and be running full speed & then instantly switch back…the avatar body would just fall to the ground and they were literally in an instant transferred. 

One shell to the next.

That’s all it is. 

One shell to the next.

Then on Monday I took Ains for her one year check up (2 months late but we needed to save up for it!) and I told our doctor that we had lost baby Addison. Her eyes glistened and got heavy. 

It always amazes me when our doctors cry for us…both our pediatrician and my doc that delivers our kiddos have cried with me before. Even though they hear about this stuff daily….they are still touched by it. Amazing.

She said- Casey you know this is a soul, and that little soul is in heaven as we speak.

I know. Gone from one tiny shell to a new place.

Hope.

I love hope. I love knowing we have hope in heaven.

I love knowing no matter how icky it gets here on earth….we have perfection waiting for us. 
And we will be reunited again with any lost loves.

A loss here on earth is not final…it’s temporary.

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December 1, 2011

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  1. Kristin

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:20 pm

    Absolutely beautiful post my friend. And so very true! Your comment to Chris holds truth too, because I imagine people who don't know Jesus feel like the world is ending when someone they love so much passes away. What an awesome and loving father we have, and what a hope we have that this place is temporary, and we'll be united again with the ones we love in heaven. πŸ˜€ Love you friend! xo

  2. Momma Bird

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:22 pm

    Casey, you never fail to inspire and speak to my heart. I know that you are sharing a piece of your heart with us, but it is always such a "ah ha" moment for me too.
    thank you πŸ™‚
    hoping you are having a blessed thursday πŸ™‚

  3. dana @ wonder forest

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:22 pm

    i love this. i needed it right now. tiny shells. :).
    xo dana
    thewonderforest.com

  4. Alexandra Lauren

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:23 pm

    wow! touching. how sweet (and smart) of chris to think of death in such a way. and here when i read the title i was thinking hmm maybe sea shells today, but nope. I will forever relate shells to this post. my heart is all tingly after reading.

  5. Franchesca

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:24 pm

    Temporary. That is hope. Love this post.

  6. rellimarie

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:24 pm

    beautiful post. i'm so sorry for your loss. my heart is heavy, but still hopeful. what a wonderful way to have perspective: tiny shells. sometimes frail, and sometimes strong. but still temporary. because there is hope.

  7. LBR

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:25 pm

    beautiful. Such an encouraging reminder as I have been thinking more and more about the loss of a best friend this summer. I keep reminding myself that she is safe, happy, and home.

  8. Sydney

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:26 pm

    So beautifully said. I could not agree more.

  9. Molly

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:28 pm

    I needed to read this today! It is so true! I was really sick this summer and am now finally hopefully healing, thanks to the Lord! Thats really all we have is hope and faith and God! I have leaned on all 3 of those this past summer. Always love your posts πŸ™‚ Happy day!
    ~Molly P

  10. Kristin Rasmussen

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:28 pm

    Well said! Your children are beautiful. I empathize with where you are in life on some fronts. We struggle financially after having a baby six months ago because we felt it was what god wanted us to do. I had prayed to know what career path to take, and was told to have a baby. It is hard having financially insecurity now after quitting my job. I read your blog everyday to see your attitude of faith and perseverance in your hard time as well. I wish we could all be more open with our struggles and not have to feel embarrassed.

  11. Megs

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:33 pm

    absolutely beautiful!

  12. Megan Renee

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:42 pm

    tears trickle down my cheeks as I read this….

  13. Cassie

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:42 pm

    I love that picture! Beautiful post, this is so true! Amazing.

  14. The Cantelmo Family

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:42 pm

    So true. So thankful that we have hope beyond this life. Love it when doctors meet you where you're at.

  15. Tina

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:48 pm

    This really touched me today! I just lost my Grandma on Thanksgiving day. She was one of my closest friends. It is comforting to know that as we layed her body to rest, her soul lives on, and she is watching from Heaven. Thank you again!

  16. Ruthie Hart

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:49 pm

    I absolutely agree. Beautiful Casey!

  17. Marybeth

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:49 pm

    Such a great reminder…goes along with my post too! I love hope!

  18. Tarah

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:54 pm

    you have such a talent expressing yourself with words and art. LOVE this post. πŸ™‚ presh photo of little man too!

    http://livelaughandlovealwaysss.blogspot.com/

  19. Anonymous

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:57 pm

    beautiful post.. and can i say an adorable picture!

  20. Anonymous

    December 1st, 2011 at 8:57 pm

    Simply beautiful. I'll never forget that – tiny shells.

  21. Natalie @ NS Pottery

    December 1st, 2011 at 9:01 pm

    Beautiful. This earth is not our home.

  22. Anonymous

    December 1st, 2011 at 9:08 pm

    LOVE this.

  23. Erica

    December 1st, 2011 at 9:16 pm

    Perfect words! You continue to hit the nail on the head-amazing πŸ™‚

  24. Jennifer

    December 1st, 2011 at 9:28 pm

    That was a beautiful thing he said. My dr is a lot like yours, when she called me to tell me I had lost my baby she got choked up. She is a great, faithful woman.. Dr's like that amaze me.

  25. natalia

    December 1st, 2011 at 9:38 pm

    mmm. i love your man's words. such a beautiful picture. what a blessing to know you have such a sound foundation in your marriage!!! he is quite the man girl.

    i hope to find the doctors you have someday when i am there. what a blessing to know that when you go that they are there for you in more ways than just checking on your physical health!!!!

    absolutely beautiful gorgeous girl!
    XO.

  26. Stephanie of Pretty {much} Art

    December 1st, 2011 at 9:50 pm

    That was amazing.

    Thank you.

  27. Anonymous

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:02 pm

    I love collecting quotes…I write them down in a journal and will read them over on a religious basis.

    I've had this quote written down for a long time now:

    We are not human beings going through a temporary spiritual experience.

    We are spiritual beings going through a temporary human experience.

    This quote strikes a chord with me. I read it often…. just wanted to share. To me, it's one of those quotes that I have to read a few times.

  28. Heidi

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:05 pm

    Perfectly written..so very very true. It is always heart breaking to lose and say goodbye to those precious little shells but oh how comforting it is to know that we WILL see them again, their sweet little spirits! Thank you for sharing this today!

  29. Redheaded Daybook

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:06 pm

    I love this.
    And it's such a wonderful thought as well. Not a time to be sad but to rejoice.
    Thank you for sharing!

  30. Davida

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:12 pm

    Thank you for this. I really need this today since this is the second anniversary of my husband's death. Your words are bringing me peace.

  31. OkieMama

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:30 pm

    "For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes." James 4:14

    I'm sorry to hear about Addison. But there will come a day when He will wipe away every tear from our eyes, and death shall be no more. Thanks so much for sharing your life.

  32. Anonymous

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:50 pm

    beautiful words and such truth!

  33. Kelly

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:52 pm

    You made me weepy. Beuatiful post Casey.

  34. The Bosmas

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:53 pm

    This post reminds me of the book "Heaven is for Real." I'm not sure if you have read it or not, but it only took me an afternoon because it is an easy read and I was so drawn into the story. If you ever get a chance to read it, I highly suggest it!!

  35. Kassie

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:54 pm

    First off, that picture is so cute!

    I say this often (probably every time I read your blog) but you get to me… your heart…your words. I appreciate that because I don't come across an honest person like you that often!

    Thanks for sharing hope and your heart! <3

  36. Anonymous

    December 1st, 2011 at 10:56 pm

    Those words gave me chills. Beautifully spoken xox.

  37. Kassie Krebsbach

    December 1st, 2011 at 11:06 pm

    This was such a touching post – the perfect perspective. And I LOVE the picture of Aiden at the beginning – really love it.

  38. ...sarah.

    December 1st, 2011 at 11:23 pm

    What beautiful thoughts, Casey! I like the analogy very much.

  39. Cindy

    December 1st, 2011 at 11:40 pm

    This made me teary-eyed. I'm going to save this as a favorite page link so that if I ever need to refer to this reminder,I won't feel as much pain, but rather hopefulness. I will also save it so I can share it with anyone else grieving. Thank you for your post.

  40. serendipity and kate

    December 1st, 2011 at 11:47 pm

    Thanks Casey for this amazing post. x

  41. Jenni Austria Germany

    December 2nd, 2011 at 12:01 am

    oooh, this gave me chills.

    and i love how similar baby aiden looks to current aiden. πŸ™‚

  42. Mr. Taylor and his Lady

    December 2nd, 2011 at 12:33 am

    this is just such a beautiful post. and oh so very true! i know that it still can be hard to let go of that person you have grown to see daily, but as long as we remember that they are still there, just not there outer "shells". brilliant!
    xo TJ

  43. Elizabeth

    December 2nd, 2011 at 12:59 am

    beautifully said! girl, you have a gift. i love seeing you use it! πŸ™‚

  44. Kim @ The Sasse Life

    December 2nd, 2011 at 1:13 am

    Amen! Beautiful post.
    Kim
    http://www.thesasselife.com

  45. karla@ bluegrass jewelry designs

    December 2nd, 2011 at 1:41 am

    I have lost 4 babies and although it is very sad and heartbreaking, I find comfort in knowing that I will see them in Heaven someday.

  46. Melissa, SoChick!

    December 2nd, 2011 at 2:05 am

    When your Doctors grieve with you, that's how you know they are good ones. It was the same when I worked in the Veterinary field.. I could never understand how some people weren't fazed when a client lost a pet. My heart ached for every one of them… and I was a receptionist.. I just made the appointments and helped around where I was needed. But, I felt the love for each of those pets… even the one's whose owners didn't. I know it's so different people and Animals… but that's how I relate to it.

    Such a beautiful way to remember that we will meet the ones we've loved and lost… a great way to keep the faith and hope. Xo

  47. Evett

    December 2nd, 2011 at 2:09 am

    Casey,

    I see too that your husband is a blessing to you, as mine is to me.

    Bless your heart. Again, I love your transparency.

  48. Aubrey

    December 2nd, 2011 at 2:14 am

    first. How fab is that photo of baby A??
    I am so glad you shared this.

  49. Richard

    December 2nd, 2011 at 2:31 am

    I agree this is really cute!

    Best pre workout supplement

  50. Sandy a la Mode

    December 2nd, 2011 at 2:39 am

    you write soo beautifully my dear~~

  51. lori

    December 2nd, 2011 at 2:43 am

    this is beautiful… you are seriously touching so many people. i love that your doctors cry with you. and i love how real you are… you are a beautiful soul, casey!

  52. Anonymous

    December 2nd, 2011 at 3:36 am

    Oh, lovey, your and your husband's words are inspiring and wonderful! Tiny shells. What a beautiful and simple explanation. I'm so sorry for your loss and will pray for you, your family and for your sweet baby with Jesus. xoxo

  53. Donna

    December 2nd, 2011 at 3:39 am

    What a truly beautiful post Casey. It takes someone who is beautiful on the inside as well as you are on the outside…Never change ok?! Xx

  54. larissa

    December 2nd, 2011 at 3:47 am

    love this. so hard to remember sometimes. but "we have perfect waiting for us" is the most amazing thing i've heard this week. God is good.

  55. Lindsay

    December 2nd, 2011 at 3:50 am

    This is such an amazing reminder! LOVE you girl:)

  56. LisaC

    December 2nd, 2011 at 3:53 am

    Beautiful post.

  57. I am LOVD

    December 2nd, 2011 at 4:00 am

    Beautiful perspective and so comforting when thought of in that way. I hope you get a chance to read my post today on the heart knowing the truth about us, and going through the process of teaching our mind how great we really are, every one of us.

  58. .cleah.

    December 2nd, 2011 at 4:29 am

    http://mormonchannel.org/video/mormonmessages?lang=eng#player

    families can be together forever. you will get to raise your babies. families can be eternal Casey.

  59. β™₯ CheChe

    December 2nd, 2011 at 5:20 am

    "I love hope. I love knowing we have hope in heaven."

    hope is a beautiful thing when its home is the heavenly places…

    β™₯CheChe

    blessed by your mind girl! and I can see what you mean by Avatar

  60. Anonymous

    December 2nd, 2011 at 5:56 am

    One shell to the next. I love that so much. That is exactly what heaven will be. Just an instant transfer and our earthly shells will mean nothing. That is hope. Love this Casey.

  61. Anonymous

    December 2nd, 2011 at 5:59 am

    A beautiful reminder that those who know Christ get to be with him forever, and every tear will be wiped away. <3 your blog is such an encouragement to me! keep it up, Casey!

  62. Flor

    December 2nd, 2011 at 8:17 am

    such a beautiful post and I just love your honesty. <3

  63. Heather

    December 2nd, 2011 at 11:26 am

    I love that analogy. I never thought about it like avatar. That's so perfect. I can't imagine what you have gone through, but it is so nice to know that you can be reunited. Thanks for the thought provoking post.

  64. Caroline

    December 2nd, 2011 at 11:50 am

    This was amazing. I am not a religious person, but I read your blog from time to time because you are so hopeful and inspiring, that I think that transcends all beliefs (or non-beliefs). And this post did exactly that. The one major fear I have in life is that the ones I love most will pass away. It is a crippling fear, and I know you relate to that. It is the one place that I feel I am not strong, and need help with. This post was that help. Thank you. Even if I don't necessarily believe in a "God," I do believe there is more than we know/can see in this world, and thinking of someone's spirit/soul as continuing and bodies just as shells is inspiring. It truly is. Thank you again.

  65. Kirsten

    December 2nd, 2011 at 1:59 pm

    So true Casey! A friend of mine passed along this parable describing death as a transition to a better afterlife when our mutual friend passed away. It's definitely in keeping with "one shell to the next" way of thinking. I hope you enjoy it. =) Sorry if it's a bit long but it's worth the read!

    -The Story of the Dragonfly-

    Down below the surface of a quiet pond lived a little colony of water bugs. They were a happy colony, living far away from the sun. For many months they were very busy, scurrying over the soft mud on the bottom of the pond. They did notice that every once in a while one of their colony seemed to lose interest in going about with its friends. Clinging to the stem of a pond lily, it gradually moved out of sight and was seen no more.

    "Look!" said one of the water bugs to another. "One of our colony is climbing up the lily stalk. Where do you suppose she is going?" Up, up, up it went slowly. Even as they watched, the water bug disappeared from sight. Its friends waited and waited but it didn't return. "That's funny!" said one water bug to another. "Wasn't she happy here?" asked a second water bug. "Where do you suppose she went?" wondered a third. No one had an answer. They were greatly puzzled.

    Finally one of the water bugs, a leader in the colony, gathered its friends together. "I have an idea. The next one of us who climbs up the lily stalk must promise to come back and tell us where he or she went and why." "We promise," they said solemnly.

    One spring day, not long after, the very water bug who had suggested the plan found himself climbing up the lily stalk. Up, up, up he went. Before he knew what was happening, he had broken through the surface of the water, and fallen onto the broad, green lily pad above.

    When he awoke, he looked about with surprise. He couldn't believe what he saw. A startling change had come to his old body. His movement revealed four silver wings and a long tail. Even as he struggled, he felt an impulse to move his wings. The warmth of the sun soon dried the moisture from the new body. He moved his wings again and suddenly found himself up above the water. He had become a dragonfly.

    Swooping and dipping in great curves, he flew through the air. He felt exhilarated in the new atmosphere. By and by, the new dragonfly lighted happily on a lily pad to rest. Then it was that he chanced to look below to the bottom of the pond. Why, he was right above his old friends, the water bugs! There they were, scurrying about, just as he had been doing some time before. Then the dragonfly remembered the promise: "The next one of us who climbs up the lily stalk will come back and tell where he or she went and why."

    Without thinking, the dragonfly darted down. Suddenly he hit the surface of the water and bounced away. Now that he was a dragonfly, he could no longer go into the water. "I can't return!" he said in dismay. "At least I tried, but I can't keep my promise. Even if I could go back, not one of the water bugs would know me in my new body. I guess I'll just have to wait until they become dragonflies too. Then they'll understand what happened to me, and where I went." And the dragonfly winged off happily into its wonderful new world of sun and air.

  66. Karie @ The HoB

    December 2nd, 2011 at 2:24 pm

    Hope is amazing! Love that God can give us Hope!

  67. Heather

    December 2nd, 2011 at 2:55 pm

    Oh, how I needed to read this, this morning. Losing a loved one is one of my greatest fears and one that has been bothering me lately… this was a great comfort.

  68. Holly K. Turfitt

    December 2nd, 2011 at 3:24 pm

    Casey- Thank you so much for this. My sister and I lost our mother unexpectedly 5 months ago (3 weeks after I got married). We still feel sad and extremely lost. She was our world.
    I was the one who found her. Once I realized that she had passed I could no longer look at the "shell" that was left behind. It wasn't her. It was just the vehicle that God put her soul in. Her soul was already with him in heaven.
    Thank you.

  69. Kristy

    December 2nd, 2011 at 4:02 pm

    Beautifully said, Case!!!!
    In the last 6 years I have lost A LOT of loved ones…..lost my daddy, then had a miscarriage, then last year lost my mamaw (who was like a mom to me) and my grandpa (the only grandpa I had ever known). If you would have asked me 6 years ago, I would have said that there was NO WAY I could have handled all of that, but I did. And I handled it better than I ever would have imagined and this is exactly why!! I finally understood this concept that you are talking about and I know that we are only temporarily separated!!

  70. sarah

    December 2nd, 2011 at 4:43 pm

    beautiful. i was staring at the stars in a crisp, clear night last night and all i could think about was how temporary this life that we know is. and how we're not made for this. but for heaven. for that next shell. it's amazing that we are able to have that hope.

  71. Brooke

    December 2nd, 2011 at 7:35 pm

    This was beautiful. Such a great reminder.

  72. Megan

    December 2nd, 2011 at 7:55 pm

    LOVE this post! Shells… check!

  73. Taylor and Robin

    December 2nd, 2011 at 8:43 pm

    Good perspective Casey. We lost our first baby years ago and I found/find hope in knowing we'll see her in Heaven. I love the promise in Joel where it says, "I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten" (Joel 2:25) and know that we will get to have a relationship with her in Heaven that will be better than what it would have been here on Earth. There is still great pain in the loss – death is hard – it's unnatural, part of the Fallen world, but thank the Lord for a Savior who conquered death once and for all so that we might live and live abundantly! So I am thankful for the suffering that has given hope, glorious hope, that does not disappoint (Rom 5:3-5)!

  74. Heather :: AFD Jewelry ::

    December 2nd, 2011 at 10:01 pm

    beautiful post…

  75. Hi!

    December 3rd, 2011 at 11:55 pm

    I Absolutely love your posts….they are always strait from your heart. Beautiful…Thank You!

  76. Alexandra Rose

    December 4th, 2011 at 1:01 pm

    I love the way you write Casey, it's beautiful. The way you see life is beautiful. and the way you and your husband help eachother see and understand the world is beautiful. You are both so blessed.
    http://beingmama.com/
    http://ohsoprettylife.blogspot.com/

  77. SassAFrass

    December 4th, 2011 at 7:16 pm

    Well said. What a great way to describe it. Thank you for sharing your faith and beliefs.

  78. nancygrayce

    January 11th, 2012 at 3:50 am

    I loved what our pastor said when my daddy died……"he took one last breath on earth and breathed his next breath in heaven."

  79. Casey

    January 16th, 2012 at 2:11 pm

    Beautifully said. I have tears in my eyes.

  80. Nicole

    March 6th, 2012 at 3:42 pm

    i.love.this.

    http://www.littlemomentsinlife.com

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